Sunday June 11, 2006 – "In Case You End Up in a Rough Patch”

After a bit of brainstorming of activities and perusing some free tourist handouts, we settled on a day at the “country club.” We hadn’t swung a golf club in at least a year, but seeing that we have exhausted most other activity options, it sounded like a great idea. The course was advertised as only 15 pounds for as many rounds as you’d like to play with women being half price. I guess the first red flag should have been the owner (Robin) ensuring me over the phone that the course (suitable for beginners) wouldn’t be crowded (a Sunday afternoon mind you). When we were finished playing we could have a drink by the pool and even go for a swim if we liked.

The “thought we were lost several times after ending up on mountainous dirt backroads” drive to Vikla Golf and Country Club took about 30 minutes. Upon arrival we trotted into the dusty cluttered “country club” (house conversion) and paid our “green fees.” Robin provided us our “complimentary water for the course” (refilled plastic water containers) and cutouts from doormats “in case you end up in a rough patch.” We soon realized the “rough patch” encompassed the entire weed/rock/dirt strewn course except for the irrigated greens. As much as we laughed about the barrenness of it all, Vikla was just about right for our pathetic golfing display. We had a really enjoyable afternoon and when you think about how much water is used irrigating a single golf course (700,000+ gallons of water a day in California), placing your ball on a doormat prior to every hit to save a little water didn’t seem half bad.

On the drive home, we stopped in at another “country club” to brush up on our “only did this once in middle school” archery skills. After about an hour bow and arrowing away, our far from Robin Hood display quickly lost its entertainment value. Two horses were led by “ranch hands” onto the archery facility from an adjacent barn. After putting two and two together, we quickly said: they are going to do what I think they are going to do / couldn’t this wait 5 minutes until we leave / isn’t there a more romantic secluded location for this… The metaphorical awkward “are they fighting mommy” train wreck that ensued will unfortunately forever etch Elias
Country Club into our collection of Cyprus memories.